beauty

Ugh… How can I expect my daughter to believe she’s beautiful, when I can’t even get over my own shortcomings..

Today’s just one of those days where everything bothers me.. the scars on my lip, just ticking me off more than normal.
Freckles, yuck.. hair, frizzy.. nose, too big today.. teeth, slightly crooked.. did I mention the scars?

I’ve always known I’m not one of the “pretty girls”… Kind of knew that since I was 10… By that age you kind of know already where you fit in..

But I never thought I was terribly ugly or anything.

After years of hearing it though, it’s hard to look in the mirror and not think it…

Do you realize I had went years without really looking in the mirror?.. You may wonder how? How could you get ready in the morning?

Well, it’s easy.. If I had to do something, ie. brush hair, I would look at my hair… eye makeup, look at my eyes.. etc.. I never really looked at me though.

Sometimes I would catch glimpses and would cry.. I really tried not to look...

It wasn’t until recently that I began being able to even look at myself in the mirror. It’s still a process for me. Many days where the negative overwhelms the positive…

Yes, I know this is a shallow post… Why am I posting something so trivial as looks, right?

Well, it’s something every woman deals with. Every single woman… married woman… young woman… old woman… We all know we’re beautiful, right?.. but we also have that little part of us that wants to be one of the pretty girls.

Done rambling for the night… Just another single mom, working on her self-esteem, so she can be a good example to those girls who are growing up and needing their own self-esteem, so that they don’t run into stupid decisions like I did!

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6 thoughts on “beauty

  1. What’s the problem?
    Are you comparing yourself to the stick insects in magazines or the B.S. version of beauty shown on the drool box? As for keeping up with the rich bitch just down the road or your kid worrying about the idiots in her school WTH.
    I’m lucky, my partner is a normal person, not a “classical or magazine beauty”, there again in the grand scheme of things I’m Joe (sub) average so we ended up well matched visually.
    Our approach to what others think about us?
    You don’t want to know us because of WHO WE ARE or WHAT WE LOOK LIKE?
    Your loss!

    • That’s awesome!! It definitely was a, “woe is me day,” LOL!! I try to have your attitude most of the time, but sometimes it gets me down 🙂

  2. Sadly, f you hear it enough you will start to believe it. However, going through this mental abuse myself, I had to have the will to pick myself up – if not for me, then at least for the sake of my son. Chin up. Stay positive. You have been nominated for the “I’m NOT Featured on Freshly Pressed” Award. 🙂 x

    • Thank you! You’re so right, if we’re hear it enough we’ll start to believe it.. Trying to dig myself out of the lies I believed for so long!

      • I heard it for quite some time, so I know exactly where you’re coming from. I wrote a post where I explained when I was pregnant and my husband (still married but I left him a year ago) would grind me down calling me ugly. So believe me, I know how you feel.

        Take your time and soon you will see the beauty within you as well as on the outside. x

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